Somewhat Manly Nerd

I’m obviously a bit manic right now, as this is the third post I’m writing tonight, after not writing anything for a week. I blame it on Google Chrome. A new browser — so exciting! (By the way, I really don’t think I have a grasp on when dashes, semi-colons, or colons are most appropriate. I missed that day in my college writing class. Either that, or we never went over it, considering half of the students at Stony Brook can’t form a coherent paragraph in English.)

Getting back to our eventual overlords at Google, their new browser doesn’t exactly set the world on fire. But it is pretty fast. But I can’t really notice it much on my sub-par Verizon DSL connection. So should I even use it instead of Firefox Beta 3? What are the advantages? I do like the homepage with a bunch of windows of your most visited sites, but I wish you could add more. On my 1920×1200 screen, the 9 windows take up maybe 1/4 of the screen. I could have 36 windows to choose from! I’m not even sure if I visit 36 websites.

I have no doubt this is only one of the many options Google has planned for this browser. If they really want to cut into Microsoft’s — and Mozilla’s — market share, they’re going to have to add some killer features. Features that anyone can utilize easily. For now, they’ve gone the simple route, making sure the browser actually works, and works quickly. Should’ve seen that coming from the company whose search engine distanced itself from the competition with its simplicity.

People who have a ton of Firefox extensions probably already know by now that Chrome is not for them — at least not yet. There’s no Adblock, no Greasemonkey, no Ubiquity. Me, I don’t even notice that Adblock is gone, and I have yet the chance to get accustomed to Ubiquity. And those were the only two I used at all. Maybe if I had some porn-fetching extension, I’d be more concerned.

So as it is, I think I’ll try out Chrome for the week. I guess I’ll just invest in the future of the browser. The interface is slick enough — what with its minimalist style — and I could get used to the incognito mode. That way I can watch One Tree Hill on Hulu without anyone knowing. I’m pretty sure that’s exactly what Google was thinking of when they added such a feature. Yep.

And right as I reach the end of this post, I realize you can add a desktop shortcut, start menu shortcut, or quick-launch icon for any web application (like Facebook or WordPress) — not just Google applications. That’s pretty cool. Maybe I know how I feel about Google Chrome now.

And I bet it’s pretty much the complete opposite of how Microsoft feels.

Find out for yourself if you haven’t already. Download Google Chrome here.

P.S. I know a few posts down I said that Ubiquity was the future of the internet. Man, I am such an IDIOT.

The game Will Wright has been working on since I left high school is finally out. And I couldn’t care less. The massive penises have already been created. The flying penises, too. Even creatures with multiple penises. What else is left for us gamers to accomplish with this game? I think the penis creator game is the pinnacle of our civilization. And now that all the phalluses imagined over generations by the collective human mind have been put on the net for the amusement of our entire species, I rather just start up another game of SimCity 4.

I was excited appromixately two years ago about Spore — when the graphics and art style actually looked decent, and I wasn’t busy playing and anticipating next-gen games. Now I’m already behind on the games I own, and the massive holiday flood is imminent, bringing along with it Gears of War 2, Fallout 3, Rock Band 2, Prince of Persia, Left 4 Dead, Red Alert 3, etc. The more I see and hear about it, Spore seems like a more ambitious version of The Sims. Maybe if I were a little kid again, I could get into such a game, but I’m going to go out on a ledge here and declare that the game can’t be all that deep. I rather spend my time playing and learning Civ 4 or Company of Heroes. There’s just too much gaming out there — too much gaming I need to catch up with — for me to bother with Spore at this point. I rather blow guys arms and legs off in Fallout 3 than wage war in a G-rated colorful world more childish than a Pixar movie. I rather fight in the online co-op zombie game that is Left 4 Dead than decide where I’m going to put the eyes on my new creature.

Maybe I’m finally becoming one of those “cool gamers” who think they’re too old for light-hearted “fun” games. Or maybe I just don’t feel like wasting my time with a dumbed-down RTS with an admittedly impressive character creator. Especially when you can buy (or *cough* download *cough*) the latter for much cheaper than the entire game.

I was all ready to watch the replay of the Season 7 premiere of The Shield. I didn’t watch the episode at 10 pm because — like a dummy — I wanted to watch the Mets game. I figured the game would be over by 11 pm, and I’d be able to watch Vic Mackey own faces without missing the Mets bullpen blow another game. Not only is the game not over, but I can’t watch it. And I can’t watch The Shield. Maybe the signal is back now, but the damage has been done. I’ve missed the first 10 minutes of the episode, and I’m pissed. I am now forced to torrent the episode. THIS IS YOUR FAULT DIRECTV. THE BLOOD OF F/X’S ADVERTISERS ARE ON YOUR HANDS. 

I want FIOS more than ever.

I have no idea what I’m even doing yet, but the potential for this tool is positively IMMENSE. Even if SUPER-ALPHA PHASE, Ubiquity has a bunch of cool things to do. Most of them are tied with various Google apps. Man, Microsoft is just getting railed on the internet. IE being overtaken by Firefox, and Google creating countless browser-based applications. No wonder Steve Ballmer once said he was “going to fucking kill Google.” Anyhow, Ubiquity is a tool that attempts to bring the entire internet together.

Just go here to find out about — and then install — the future of the internet.

I’m not even sure what I can do to explain it better than Mozilla has, so just watch the video on there. I’m also really not sure HOW I’m going to implement this add-on yet, since I haven’t even had time to mess around and experiment with it yet. It’s definitely useful for people that utilize email a bunch, but I’m not one of those people. I’m sure by the end of the week, a bunch of awesome user-created scripts will be popping up across the internet. I’m trying to think of stuff, but nothing’s coming — and that’s why i don’t work at Google or Mozilla.

One thing I DO know: This would be totally fucking awesome OS-wide, not just limited to Firefox. I bet Microsoft is ready to steal the idea already.

Before the season started, I didn’t see Mike Pelfrey lasting more than a few starts. I’m glad I was wrong. Now he’s arguably the second-best pitcher on the Mets behind Johan Santana. I’ve gone from wanting to punch Pelfrey in his mouthpiece-chewing face to wanting to buy his jersey. While John Maine has broken down due to his inability to finish a batter off with less than 20 pitches, Pelfrey has emerged as the workhorse of the staff. Back-to-back complete games. You don’t see that much from pitchers not named Halladay or Sabathia nowadays.

At 6’7″, he’s an absolute beast capable of eating up innings like Koreans eat up Starcraft. Combined with his heavy sinker leading to quick outs and DPs, you have the recipe for many complete games to come. Still kinda bummed he didn’t get the shutout tonight, but any night I don’t have to see a reliever run in from the outfield is a great night.

In related news, I don’t mind seeing Carlos Delgado in the field or at-bat anymore. How the hell did that happen? Two months ago, I wanted him tossed out onto the street. Unfortunately, I still want the entire bullpen tossed out onto the street, shot, and burned alive.

Sleep. It is so glorious. I haven’t gotten enough of it lately. Maybe that’s why I got sick. Maybe too many nights at the bar got me sick. Maybe running in the early stages of my illness was a bad idea.

But I used my propensity to lie in bed to take advantage of my 360 as a media center. Many episodes of golden age Simpsons were watched, with Homer at the Bat standing out. Man, that episode is so awesome.

Mr. Burns: Mattingly, I told you to shave those sideburns!

Homer: You’re Darryl Strawberry!
Strawberry: Yes.
Homer: You play Right Field!
Strawberry: Yes.
Homer: I play Right Field too.
Strawberry: So?
Homer: … Well, are you better than me?
Strawberry: Well, I’ve never met you, but… yes.

And of course the credits song:

Well, Mr. Burns had done it.
The power plant had won it,
With Roger Clemens clucking all the while.
Mike Scoscia’s tragic illness made us smile,
While Wade Boggs lay unconscious on the barroom tile!

We’re talkin’ softball,
From Maine to San Diego.
Talkin’ softball,
Mattingly and Canseco,
Ken Griffey’s grotesquely swollen jaw,
Steve Sax and his run-in with the law.
We’re talking Hoooomer…
Ozzie and the Straw!

The most surprisingly hilarious quote out of all the episodes I watched had to be this one, though:

Lisa: Dad, what if I told you you could lose weight without dieting or lifting a finger?
Homer: I’d say you’re a lying scumbag. Why sweetie?

Scumbag is just a hilarious word, and I was shocked by “scumbag” coming out of Homer’s mouth back in 1992.

Other than The Simpsons, I actually started up Lost again. I had given up a few episodes into Season 3 after realizing I wasn’t paying attention each week. I had watched Season 1 on DVD, and watched Season 2 on TV and torrent alternatively. I almost gave up halfway through Season 2.

Why did I start again? 1) I’ve heard that Season 4 is fuck awesome. 2) My entire office watches it, so instead of being totally out of the loop and wanting to kill people talking about it the next day, I figure I should catch up before new episodes start again — whenever that is.

I watched 4 episodes of Season 3, and I’m surprised I stopped watching. It’s not bad at all. I think this cements the fact that Lost is infinitely better in short-term viewing. Man, I love streaming shit to my 360.

Did I mention I slept in between all this TV watching? It was awesome.

I also did play some Team Fortress 2 as well, but not enough to unlock any of the new Heavy weapons. Maybe because I was too busy being a Medic to heal all the Heavies, or being a Pyro to run circles around them and burn their faces.

I’ll end with this cool little thing:

Go here and select Team Fortress 2 Signature. (Click on Steam Signature and there’s a dropdown box)

You may have noticed I haven’t posted much lately. This is due to work, too many nights at the Half-Penny Pub, and many ideas for posts that I shot down. Here are some examples:

- Michael Phelps is a Massive Toolbag Who Looks Like an Alien

- The Very Best MySpace Pages of Teenage Girls

- How I Will Kill Veronica Belmont’s Significant Other and Steal Her Heart (Kinda Like Tom Cruise in The Last Samurai)

- All My Personal Financial Information Summarized Neatly in an Excel Spreadsheet

- Will Ferrell is a Very Funny Guy and I Love Seeing Him Star in Four Movies a Year

- My Dick Growth Chart

- This Week in Bowel Movements

- My Personal Financial Records Summarized in an Excel Spreadsheet

- Heath Ledger Jokes

- Should I Go Hairy or Shaven? (Complete with Full Body Pics!)

- A 9-5 Workday Liveblog

- Best Places in the World to Kill Yourself

- Dating Advice From a Master of Being Awkward

- Why Synchronized Diving is Awesome

- The Most Exciting Things About Being an Actuary

I would’ve been the top hit on Google for “muxtape RIAA”! I googled it about 5 hours ago and there were no stories or blog posts about the message that has been residing on the muxtape.com website for hours now.

Muxtape will be unavailable for a brief period while we sort out a problem with the RIAA

Translation: Muxtape is totally fucked and will be shut down by the RIAA any day now.

I’m so sad. I put so much work into that shit. Constantly updating, favoriting other muxtapes…all wasted. All because the RIAA is a bunch of pricks that don’t realize Muxtape is something that exposes a person to new music. It’s not hurting the industry, assholes. It’s not like people can download off of Muxtape anyway. (Well, maybe there’s some person that came up with a way to do it, but that’s besides the point.)

It was inevitable, but I still don’t want Muxtape to go away. Why do I get the feeling that Muxtape will never be back from “sorting out this problem with the RIAA”?

Yeah, that’s right, another drunk post. I feel like this one might be more of a grammatical disaster than the last one.

So the Mets bullpen has to be the worst in the history of the Major Leagues amoong contending teams. They’ve blown no less than 10 games. And that’s being EXTREMELY generous. Heilman, Sanchez, and Wagner: all totally worthless. Especially Heilman. Holy shit, I couldn’t even do work for the last two hours because I was so pissed off at Heilman’s ineptitude. LOS METS.

I’m still sore over Rachel Nichols not being at Jets practice on Saturday. Damn you, Rachel. You had been following Brett Favre for weeks, and then you decided to stop just as I hoped to see you. I went to Jets practice not for Brett, but for you. You broke my heart Rachel.

Fortunately, Pineapple Express owned my weekend. Most consistently entertaining and hilarious movie I’ve seen in a long, long time. Possibly the funniest Apatow movie yet. That’s right, I went there. Superbad is overrated.

Man, I am so done. Darts takes more out of you than you might think. And blowing fireballs, too. I’m a busy man. I just hope I can wake up for work tomorrow.

I want to drill a hole in my head. I’m typing this in Dark Room (a glorified, black screen version of Notepad) since I’m not connected to the internet right now. Wait, maybe I am. But a minute ago I wasn’t. And in ten seconds I won’t be. WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!?

This has been happening since I reinstalled Vista SP1 earlier today. I already tried it once and the same shit was happening. Why’d I even bother trying again? Did I think it would magically work? Nothing ever fucking magically works with PCs. I’ve noticed my internet disconnecting randomly even before SP1, but it was nowhere this disgustingly awful. It takes less than 2 minutes for my connection to a massive dump on my face. It had a free pass for a few hours since I wasn’t actually at the laptop. But coming home to a torrent that has barely gone anywhere and an IM cilent signed off every service gave the current state of affairs away.

I’m going back to XP. An upgrade if you ask me. Oh noes, I won’t have DirectX 10. My laptop isn’t powerful enough to truly take advantage of it anyway. If I want to play Dawn of War II and Red Alert 3 at awesome settings, I’m going to have to buy/build a new desktop anyway. Maybe then I’ll convince myself that Vista is worth the torture.

FUCK I JUST TRIED SEARCHING FOR GAMES THAT REQUIRE VISTA AND I GOT A PAGE LOAD ERROR FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUU

NOW I JUST TRIED POSTING A COMMENT ON A BLOG AND MY CONNECTION CONTINUED PULLING A CARL PAVANO.

I bet it will take at least three tries for this post to upload to my blog. Every day Bill Gates doesn’t come up with a new version of Windows that actually works — even though he has semi-retired — people will die. I’m a man of my woooord.

P.S. I was going to upload a pic but of course there’s no fucking way that’s going to work.