Is there any more explanation needed? I think not.
So I was recently in Chicago for a couple of days and I figured this would be an opportunity to add to my ongoing series of city posts. This post would actually be better if the massive snowstorm didn’t move south. My flight back to New York would have been canceled and I would have most likely been stuck in Chicago for the entire weekend, judging by the snowfall amounts in the lower mid-Atlantic.
- I had never seen “CAUTION: FALLING ICE” signs on sidewalks before.
- Chicago’s skyline is the only one in North America to rival NYC’s. It’s pretty damn impressive — but still inferior. Second City indeed. I wonder which city has a higher density of Starbucks+Dunkin’ Donuts, though.
- Every other apartment had massive wooden staircases that seemed integral to the structures. Didn’t they learn anything from that incident in 1871?
- Walking around a city in a suit and overcoat had to be the first time I felt like an adult since…nope, that had to be the first time.
- Law schools being located way off main campus is total bullshit.
- Wrigley Field really does look like the 96-year-old stadium it is. And I only saw its exterior from the L (elevated rail). I imagine seating inside it makes you feel like you are back at the turn of the century. Until you notice everyone around you has a smartphone.
- Chicago apparently still wants the 2016 Olympics, as I saw a massive banner for it. Someone needs to tell Chicagoans they lost.
- Fuck deep dish pizza and fuck Roger Ebert. I had some pizza he apparently rated four stars — almost as inaccurate as his Avatar review.*
- I must admit the massive heating lights in some L stations were a nice touch, but if there’s a BIG city that needs its public transportation to be underground, it’s Chicago. Although, it was not particularly cold or windy (comparable to NYC) while I was there. Lucky me.
- O’Hare Airport didn’t have free Wi-Fi. Guess which airport did?
- On the plane trip home, while surfing through JetBlue’s live TV offerings, I came across Fox News. It was Glenn Beck, and the first words out of his mouth were, “What, do we all have pixie dust that shoots out of our butts from time to time?” I turned it off immediately before he could ruin the moment by making sense.
- I am no George Clooney — then again, who is?
*Ok, the pizza wasn’t actually THAT bad, but I just can’t endorse any pizza that is more efficiently eaten with a knife and fork. New York pizza has EATABILITY.
You gotta be fucking kidding me. What, are Americans not visiting my site anymore? IT’S THE SUPER BOWL!! VOTE IN THE GODDAMN POLL! The Colts have Peyton Manning on the field, the Saints have Kim Kardashian in the luxury box. The Colts have Reggie Wayne in the slot, and the Saints have Reggie Bush in the backfield. Who ya got?
Maybe it would get more action if it were about the rejected gay dating site ad or Tim Tebow’s anti-abortion commercial? Or perhaps a “Who would be the best Super Bowl performer” poll. That’s actually a good one, but how would I even narrow that down? But I give you an easy poll and you just ignore it, so I don’t know what to think.
I’m not going to look at my blog for a few days — when I come back on Friday, I better see at least…6 votes!
I’m doing my best to keep up with this!
On the Shoulders of Giants: A Compilation – Lookout Landing takes a shitton of sabermetric primers and explanations and puts them into one massive post. Oh my God.
Bloomberg Sports: Professional Tool – Fangraphs provides some screenshots of what looks like the most intensive tool for player tracking baseball has ever seen.
The iPad provides the ultimate browser experience? – Examples of websites that won’t work on the iPad’s browser, due to not supporting Flash (which admittedly does suck).
iPad About – Stephen Fry gives his glowing thoughts on the iPad. Yes, I’m linking to positive thoughts about the iPad. I’m attempting to be fair and balanced!
Selleck Waterfall Sandwich – Random awesomeness. Maybe it’s more awesome for me since I’ve bought my dad pretty much every season of Magnum P.I. on DVD.
Brett Favre’s last throw as a Falcon: INT
Brett Favre’s last throw as a Packer: INT
Brett Favre’s last legal throw as a Jet: INT
Brett Favre’s (possible) last throw as a Viking: INT
Brett Favre’s tears: Priceless
Of course, I use “throw” instead of “pass” for a reason. 7 on 7 flag football misdirection plays are so good to outsmart the other team. It’s amazing how he waited until the LAST POSSIBLE MOMENT to become vintage Favre. Throwing across the field for NO REASON. Absolutely tremendous.
I guess I’ll comment on the AFC Championship Game a bit, considering my team somehow made their way into it. Up until the two minute warning in the first half, the Jets were actually looking REALLY good. The Colts couldn’t score a touchdown, and Mark Sanchez was playing as well as he had played all season. His second touchdown pass of the half was really impressive, with him stepping into the throw right as a guy slammed him into the ground. I was at full mast at that point. Unfortunately, Peyton Manning then activated God Mode and was pretty much unstoppable for the rest of the 32 minutes.
There are probably plenty of people out there that don’t like him for whatever reason — and it’s not like I love him — but the guy is quite possibly the greatest quarterback of all-time. I don’t want Tom Brady to end up with more Super Bowl rings than him, I really don’t. And that’s why I’ll be rooting for the Colts in the Super Bowl. Yes, the Colts are fucking pansies for not going for the undefeated season, but the Jets had their chance to totally embarrass them for maximum hilarity today and they didn’t. Now the Super Bowl is just a matchup between the two best teams this year, and I think Manning will prove that he deserves that second ring.
Of course, the last time I made a post talking about someone being the best of all-time at something, he fucking lost. So whatever.
Only two weeks in-between “Weekend Links” posts — I’m impressed with myself.
Venturing Down Ballot Once Again, Part I and Part II – 3:10ToJoba examines the biggest screwjobs in MVP voting history, with Cal Ripken Jr. taking the prize as most royally screwed. Let’s remember, he wasn’t “The Iron Man” yet!
New York Post Mets Back Pages – Amazin’ Avenue reminds you why the Post is the most entertaining paper in the city — even though it’s barely a legitimate newspaper.
Official Brett Favre Depreciation Thread – Easily one of the best threads on GAF. Every time Brett Favre ends his career with a team with an interception, it gets bumped. Every time he retires or un-retires, it’s bumped. It will never die.
The Dogs Who Ride Trains – In Soviet Russia, dog rides you! No really, though, how goddamn cool is this? Dogs are the absolute fucking best.
The 100 Cheesiest Movie Quotes – I don’t even find some of these cheesy, but there’s enough greatness here to warrant the full 10 minutes. It’s no THE WIRE – 100 Greatest Quotes, though (by the same guy). Perhaps I should have given this it’s own post, since it’s a video, but I told myself I need at least five links.
Late Addition: NBC Will Regret Appeasing Leno – The Wall Street Journal compares NBC to Neville Chamberlain and Jay Leno to Adolf Hitler. That leaves Conan as Czechoslovakia. You won’t read anything more awesome this week.
I’m just going to embed the Hulu video of the last Tonight Show I’ll ever watch.
This is how I watched it. Yes, I missed the final Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien after making multiple posts about the whole NBC trainwreck the past two weeks; I am officially part of the problem. I chose a girl over Conan. I chose wrong. For penance, I will watch at least a whole month of Conan’s late-night show on FOX — and if not that, whatever he does next.
There’s not much I can say about this final show — you just need to watch it. You need to watch the montage and Steve Carell’s exit interview and Neil Young’s performance and Conan’s farewell speech and the closing Freebird rockout. Only Conan would end his show that way.
Spoon – Got Nuffin
I’ve mentioned Chuck a couple of times on here; it’s a show that seems to love showcasing indie bands with its song selection, but most of the time it’s pretty spot-on, as evidenced by this song. I enjoy the show, but it’s definitely a guilty pleasure — what with its pop culture references that mostly fall within the nerd spectrum, and also many hot girl-on-girl fights with ridiculous sound effects. Spoon also ties into CONAN, since they were on last night. It’s a shame they totally sucked. I’ll stick to listen to the songs I love on their studio albums, like this one.
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