It’s Almost Here: 300
David defeated Goliath with a slingshot to the face in ancient times.
The barbarian tribes invaded Rome and burnt it to the ground in 476.
Arnold Schwarzenegger was born on July 30, 1947.
Die Hard was released in 1988.
These, my friends, are only a few examples of turning points in the history of badassery. Tomorrow will be one of these days.
Of course, 300 is only chronicling a great moment in the history of masculinity, but it has brought into the collective consciousness of boys and men everywhere an event that should have already been known the world over. It may only have a 59% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, but it no doubt scores a 110 on the testosterone scale, and even higher on the Hype Train scale. I’m thoroughly convinced this movie would still turn a profit even if it had a RT score of 0%.
Starting with the mind-blowingly great trailer that was released last year, Warner Brothers has done a masterful job of creating an unstoppable force. The internet has been filled with guys drooling over this movie for months and the movie is hitting theaters just as the hype is hitting critical mass, unlike that over-hyped Samuel L. Jackson-driven movie from last year. Maybe they just had an easy job considering the movie’s content; nevertheless, I haven’t been this excited about a movie since The Matrix Reloaded (which might be a bad sign). But I know I’m not alone…
“Everyone I know is going nuts about 300.”
“When you and your friend are referring to the death of one specific soldier and know the exact details of his death, you know the hype is ridiculous.”
“It’s going to be fucking awesome.”
“Already seen it. Amazing movie. It raises your testosterone levels so high that after you’ve seen it you wanna fight or punch someone, anyone. I’m going to see it again tomorrow.”
“Action scenes are incredible. And that is practically the whole movie.”
“Shit, I walked out of the movie with a boner. What… does this mean?”
There’s not much more time left. In about 24 hours, I will experience greatness. Feel free to add your own hype quotes, and if you can’t get enough 300 talk, check out Chris’s post on it.
And if you REALLY can’t wait…here’s a R-rated trailer for the movie (unfortunately, it’s really only 2:30 long)
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