Somewhat Manly Nerd

This cool new device is another attempt by Apple to turn an industry upside down – this time the phone industry. There’s a ton of cool features shown in that video, such as the touch screen, the iPod functionality, the visual voicemail, the internet capabilities, the vertical/horizontal orientation sensor, and the cool hand gestures you can use to create actions on the screen, such as zooming in on a picture. And that video didn’t even show the 2-megapixel digital camera feature. There is no doubt that it’s one of the most technically impressive mass-market devices I’ve seen; and like all Apple creations, it looks pretty damn cool.

I’ve heard a few discouraging things, though. First off, you can’t use your iTunes music as a ringtone. That’s just a bullshit for more money by Cingular. The camera also doesn’t have a zoom feature from what I’ve heard. It also doesn’t play Flash or run Java. It just seems to be a somewhat crippled device. There’s not going to be any innovative 3rd party applications to enhance this product that has such amazing potential. I have no doubt that later iterations will improve on this already impressive creation, so I will be waiting it out. The $600 price tag doesn’t help either.

Goddamn it.

http://www.miceage.com/allutz/al010907a.htm

At the same time Disney World management was taking a pass on another Pirates update, WDI has been putting the finishing touches on the plans for the massive new Pirates of the Caribbean ride planned for Hong Kong Disneyland, and some nifty new effects and additions have recently been worked up. Since the fourth movie in the series is already in pre-production, there are tentatively more plot references and sight gags that could also end up in the rides. With all of those pieces falling into place, it was decided Disneyland would instead focus its energy and resources on getting the new Pirates Lair at Tom Sawyer Island open in time for the third movie premiere, and they’ll be pouring over 14 Million dollars into that island project in 2007.

And so Disneyland will also forego adding that Keira Knightley animatronic that Studios chief Dick Cook mentioned on the red carpet at last summer’s movie premiere. That movie premiere hasn’t formally been penciled in for Disneyland, but the plan to launch the West Coast version of Disney Cruise Line has been bumped up to later this month and the cancellation of Fantasmic! only makes it easier to host the premiere for the third time at Disneyland. Assuming the third movie isn’t a flop, and does at least 500 Million in global box office sales, the fourth movie will go into production and may be timed for an opening around 2010 when the Hong Kong version of the ride opens.

I feel bad for kids growing up now. This franchise is supposed to be their Indiana Jones…

A quick warning: Children of Men is not popcorn entertainment. It quickly announces itself as a film that is brutally uncompromising. I heard cries of “Oh my God” and “What the fuck” at numerous parts in the film. It is not a movie for the faint of heart.

In Children of Men, Alfonso Cuaron drops his audience into a not-so-distant future where there’s almost none of the technological progress that other futuristic movies display. He wastes no time in showing just how violent and chaotic the world has become: the opening segment of the movie ends with one of the most haunting images I’ve seen in a film. Even though the British government attempts to prop up its facade of stability, the last foothold of civilization is standing on its last legs. The catastrophe that caused such total collapse of the world is the infertilization of women across the face of the Earth. There hasn’t been a baby born for 18 years and no one knows why. All hope for the future has been lost.

Theo, played by Clive Owen, has more than a few reasons to be miserable, but when his supposed terrorist ex-wife (Julianne Moore) comes to him to ask for a favor, he’s willing enough to do it – for a price. Once he finds out that the cargo he is trying to transport to the coast is a girl carrying the first baby on Earth in 18 years, Theo becomes a man with something to believe in. The girl, Kee, is the last hope for humanity and together with Theo they go on an extraordinary and intense journey through what’s left of Britain.

Cuaron masterfully reveals bits and pieces of the ravaged future alternate-reality (hopefully) that provides the setting for Children of Men. From graffiti signs and commercials that expose the hopelessness that has enveloped the people of Britain to detention camps and immigration policies that display the harsh measures the government has resorted to in order to keep the nation afloat. The film almost feels as if it does not take place in the future, but instead at times appears to take place in a war-torn part of Eastern Europe.

Clive Owen gives a terrific performance throughout the film as Theo, as he deals with violent setbacks and unexpected circumstances along the journey. His elder pothead friend Jasper, played by Michael Caine, does a great job of providing some much-needed comic relief and lightheartedness throughout the almost crushingly depressing film. Kee is played by an unknown young actress named Claire-Hope Ashitey, but she does a competent job of acting scared throughout the movie. The rest of the cast does a well-enough job to enrich the audience with a some knowledge of the people that populate this collapsing world.

The entire film develops into what is basically a massive chase scene, but it’s more gripping than any other I’ve seen in a long time (Apocalypto included). The entire fate of this world rides on Kee reaching the elusive and mysterious Human Project, and the desperation of this goal presents itself in the numerous frantic action scenes that litter the movie. These scenes only increase in intensity throughout the film, cumulating in one of the most unforgettable and uniquely shot action sequences I’ve ever seen. Cuaron deserves a Directorial Oscar nod for this scene alone. The film does not cut for 10 minutes of non-stop action through a massive city battlefield. The effect makes the audience feel as if it is watching footage from an real event, or even actually there. Cuaron uses this directoral effect in many other parts of the movie, but it really shines in that spectacular sequence. Because of those long shots, I was more wowed by the action in Children of Men than in any other movie I’ve seen in the past year. It was so different from the usual blockbuster fare where there’s cuts every second. (Michael Bay, I’m looking at you)

Go see Children of Men. It is a film meant for viewing in a movie theater. It is a film that sticks with you, and one that you will want to watch again, even though you felt disheartened for most of it. At its core, it is a story that displays the worst aspects of human nature, but allows for some trickles of hope to get through. Some people might feel a bit empty at the end, hoping for more… but I couldn’t help thinking it was one of the best movies I’ve seen in a while.

I have to be strong. Only 8 days left until the return of Bauer Power Hour. From first-hand accounts, they are awesome – especially episode 4. Damn it. I want to hold off so I can watch it in HD glory. If you can’t wait… http://www.mininova.org/search/?search=24

Episodes 3 and 4 don’t seem to have leechers right now, but somehow people have gotten them. I haven’t really looked into it too much since I want to be fresh for the true premiere.

Maybe when I wake up tomorrow I’ll think differently, but I probably won’t be thinking of it due to the NFL playoffs.

In case you missed the Cowboys-Seahawks game tonight, you missed one the biggest choke jobs in professional sports history. The Cowboys were down 20-21 and they had a 19-yard FG to take the lead with less than 2 minutes left. The game was in Tony Romo’s hands…literally. He was the holder and he ended the Cowboys season. I guess he’s not going to be the holder in the Pro Bowl. Watch the video over and over. I know I will. Madden’s comments alone make it unforgettable. Hell, just go to this web page… Tony Romo Wiki. I should just register at Something Awful. It just seems like that place is unbelievably hilarious. I don’t feel like paying 10 bucks though.

So even though the Cowboys lost (but covered the spread), therefore messing up my predictions, I’m ecstatic – because I hate the Cowboys. Parcells and T.O. are a couple of douchebags. I feel bad that Romo had to take the hit, but that’s the way it goes when you suck.

It’s time for the real games tomorrow. Giants and Jets. The former will be get murdered while the other will put a fight, regardless of the outcome.

Only two hours left until kickoff. Wooooo

I just wanted to make this post so I can put in writing that if the Jets somehow manage to beat the Patriots, 2007 has the possibility of the being the greatest year of my life. I really don’t expect the Jets to get anywhere…but man, I would love to see Brady lose in the first round.  The probability of it happening is like 5% though. The guy is just too good.

The only game I actually see being close is the Cowboys – Seahawks matchup. The Colts are most likely just going to run over the Chiefs, and the Eagles will do the same to the Giants. Tiki needs to pull out another career performance for the Giants to have a chance to win. As much as I hate to do it, I’m going to pick the Cowboys in that close matchup.

J-E-T-S JETS JETS JETS

I’m by no means an obsessive moviegoer – and I would go even less if it weren’t for automated ticket machines that allow me to buy half-priced child tickets – but I feel like I saw most of the big movies last year, and my opinion rocks. Although, I do wish I had seen The Prestige and I hear Blood Diamond isn’t half-bad. I just wish Children of Men had gotten a wide release earlier (I’ll probably try to see it tonight). But without further ado, the movies of 2006 you need to see…

Little Miss Sunshine

I don’t like to use those trite words that movie reviews always have…but this movie was heartwarming. Yea, I said it. It’s a funny and ludicrous movie that leaves you with a feeling that one doesn’t feel much anymore after walking out of a movie. (Maybe because I usually stray away from those types of movies) I did not think the movie was at all indicative of its title when I first started watching, but by the end of the movie it just makes sense – and not just for the obvious reason (that the daughter of the family wants to compete in the “Little Miss Sunshine” contest). Steve Carell might be the big star in this movie, but every member of this dysfunctional family unit gives wonderfully neurotic and hilarious performances. I would put this insane family up against any other in film or television history. Little Miss Sunshine is just filled with very funny, quotable moments and also serious, thoughtful ones. Together they make one of the best and most original movies of 2006.

Casino Royale

I’m not quite as high on this movie as most people seem to be. Perhaps it’s due to my love of the recent Bourne movies, or perhaps it’s because I’m not a big Bond fan. Nevertheless, it’s still one of the best movies I saw last year. The movie just starts off so damn well only to screech to a halt near its conclusion. I can’t help but feel that the movie was all downhill after the long, blood-pumping chase scene near the beginning – even if it is a pretty impossible scene to top. The poker scenes were pretty pathetic, the plot got a bit convoluted for a bit, and they gave away one of the few legitimate shocks in the movie in the trailer and commercials. The ending also just makes you yearn for more, and I hope that the next Bond film keeps the quality up. Goldeneye was a good movie too, and we all witnessed what soon happened there. I do have to tip my hat to Daniel Craig for making me forget that Clive Owen was the first choice of almost every person in the world. And I also must credit Eva Green for being absolutely gorgeous. So even with its faults, this Bond movie brought the franchise back in a big way.

Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan

The funniest movie I have seen in a long while, and the only reason Sasha Baron Cohen got away with it is because he’s a practicing Jew. Anyone else would’ve been crucified. I never seen so many stereotypical jokes jammed into a movie before. I really don’t know what to say without giving stuff away. There’s slapstick humor, there’s hilarious one-liners, and there’s some of the most – how can I say it – daring physical comedy ever caught on film. Just buy this movie when it hits DVD, or at the very least rent it. The only thing that sobered the experience for me was hearing how little compensation he gave the residents of the Hungarian town he filmed for the movie. After all, he is Jewish.

The Departed

Hands down the best movie of 2006. Martin Scorsese is back to his old form. I was laughing while sitting on the edge of my seat until I walked out of the theater with my jaw dropped to the floor. I can’t really give Scorsese all the credit, as the script, with its razor-sharp and at times hilarious dialogue was penned by William Monahan (only his second screenplay) and The Departed is actually a remake of the Hong Kong film Infernal Affairs. But Scorsese says he never even saw that movie, and I haven’t either. I can’t imagine it being better than this masterpiece. Jack Nicholson turns in an exceptional performance as a Boston crime lord, Matt Damon acts great in a role that is possibly close to his real-life persona growing up, and Leonardo DiCaprio pulls off the best performance of his career. Not only does this trio of leading actors work flawlessly together, but the rest of the cast is filled with wonderful performances. Mark Wahlberg plays his passionate asshole role perfectly, Alec Baldwin rolls off a few unforgettable lines, and Martin Sheen does a brillant job in his old mentor role. The sole woman that plays any sort of role in the film, played by Vega Farmiga, manages to bring some civility to vulgar and violent subject matter that The Departed, and Scorsese, revels in. The sole complaint I have with the movie is the godawful Comfortably Numb cover. I might just skip that scene altogether when I watch the film on DVD. But when the biggest complaint I can come up with is a song that some people might not even really care about (these people are heathens) one must make the conclusion that the movie is awesome. Watch this movie as soon as humanly possible.

Honorable Mentions:

Crank – A throwback to the ridiculousness of 80s action movies, mixed with the flash of today. Jason Statham is pretty much the man and he continues to show it in this movie, even if it is basically a B-action movie. You can tell by the spotty CGI. But the non-stop action mixed with some priceless moments make this a movie that any warm-blooded male between the ages of 14-35 will love.
Apocalypto - Mel Gibson knows how to make a feast for the eyes. He also knows how to upset the stomach. This sometimes brutally violent and graphic film truly puts the viewer into an ancient time and place. The first half paints a somewhat short-sighted picture of the fall of the Mayan civilization while the last half of the film is pure adrenaline – much like all of Crank, but better.

Heterosexual men across the nation – rejoice! – for the O.C. will be no more as of February 22. Well, maybe the hot chicks gave guys a reason to watch the show… Nevertheless, it’s good to see Fox cancel a show like this for a change, unlike something like Arrested Development. (Actually, Fox cancels shows every week, but this is still awesome news.)

Taste the happy, people.

Source.

 

I really can’t imagine celebrating the New Year in any time zone other than EST, a.k.a. the “Times Square Ball-Drop” time zone. The ball drop is everything. Do other time zones have a ball drop too? I don’t even know. Doesn’t matter – it’s all about Times Square.

Hopefully, 2007 will be better than 2006, but I’ve been saying that for the past 3 years. As a result, I’m going to go with another, less optimistic slogan…

Life Still Sucks ’07.

Join the campaign. You know it to be true.

At least I saw a kid get punched in the face tonight. That was cool.

Apple Trailer Page (it’s Trailer 2)

My childhood continues to be destroyed. The first half of the trailer is the same as the last one…and then the second half consists of some of the worst slapstick humor I’ve ever seen. What a disgrace.

I really need to buy Seasons 2-9 on DVD so I can remember how good The Simpsons used to be.