Oscars Outsourced to India
8 Oscars for Slumdog Millionaire?? First they took our IT jobs, now this. Next thing you know, 7-Elevens across the country will be shutting down.
It wasn’t really a surprise, though, as the film has been hyped as the feel-good story of the year, and its competition wasn’t exactly strong. At least that’s what I hear, considering I haven’t seen any of them. I actually tried to convince my dad to go see Slumdog with my mom last night when he said he wanted to go to the movies (this never happens), but he thought it sounded too cheesy. I can’t blame him, as that’s the reason I haven’t seen it either. I rather go see The Wrestler — the film probably most shafted by the Academy.
I know most geeks on the internet will say The Dark Knight was obviously the most shafted, but it actually won two awards, while The Wrestler was only nominated for two. The Boss getting left out when there were only three songs nominated is total fucking garbage. Now, I’m going to pretend that I saw both movies and say that Mickey Rourke should’ve won Best Actor over Sean Penn. (A sidenote: Clint Eastwood should’ve been nominated for Gran Torino, since he carried the entire film) This is all California’s fault. If Proposition 8 failed, Rourke would’ve won. But no, the majority of the state had to hate gays, so the people of Hollywood had to make it known that gays are cool. And Penn had to preach from the stage. The Oscars never get by without some politicking.
But maybe Rourke will get a pity Oscar sometime down the road when he’s in his 60s, which isn’t far off. I couldn’t believe when I found out today that he is 56. The guy was in pretty damn impressive shape for The Wrestler. That is Stallone-level shit right there. Probably why Stallone recruited him for the movie destined to have the highest concentration of testoterone ever — The Expendables. That linked article doesn’t even mention that Arnold will have a cameo.
But now I’m getting off-topic. Possibly because I don’t have much to say about these Oscars. The only other notable thing would be Pixar’s offerings continuing to be treated as second-class productions. And Adrian Brody being the odd man out in the collection of past Best Actor winners. De Niro, Hopkins, Douglas, Kingsley…Brody. Let’s not talk about the musical parts with Hugh Jackman in the lead. He has to be some sort of new super-homosexual. A gay man that looks more masculine — but can also sing and dance better — than every heterosexual male.
Oh wait, I almost forgot about the awesome acceptance speeches by Japanese guys that set stereotypes back 50 years. YouTube links will be added later if they are put up.
And here we go:
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