Running is Pretty Much the Most Painful Thing Ever

2008 June 6
by CajoleJuice

More painful than being one of those cyclists in my last post. Than getting tortured via ball-slamming Casino Royale-style. Than fighting Kimbo Slice. Than kicking your shins up against a tree over and over Kickboxer-style. Than falling 30 feet off a halfpipe.

I don’t know what a “runner’s high” is. I’ve never experienced it. I’ve only experienced regret as I realized I have run over a mile away from my house. It seems a person needs to be a special type of masochist to enjoy running. Heck, I’m an emotional masochist myself, but not physical. I rather play an actual sport than just RUN. It’s so goddamn boring. I tried going for a run yesterday and was winded 7 minutes in. I tried listening to LCD Soundsystem – 45:33 while I ran, but I was already back home by the time it started reaching its climax. Failure.

Running just sucks. I will never get it.

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  • Abraham

    come on, running is all about mental toughness. If you don’t have what it takes upstairs, you’ll never be a good runner.

  • CajoleJuice

    That sounds about right.

  • Anonymous