Hilarious Protestant Church Sayings

2007 June 18
by CajoleJuice

We’ve all seen these signs. I was raised Catholic, so we didn’t have signs like this in front of our church, but every other type of Christian church seems to love their clever, holy catchphrases. There’s plenty of pictures of these types of church signs on the internet (like on the site that is watermarked on the picture right above), but I’m going to list some gems that the Methodist church in my hometown has had over the years. I would take pictures myself, but I don’t have one of those newfangled digital cameras.

3 NAILS
+ 1 CROSS
= 4 GIVEN

It’s hard to stumble
when you’re on your knees!

ETERNITY:
Smoking or
Non-Smoking?

Come see me after the game!
-GOD

Seven days without God
makes one WEAK!

Life is short
PRAY HARD.

Our COFFEE HOUR is happier
than most HAPPY HOURS!

God answers KNEE-MAIL.

I can’t think of anymore off the top of my head right now, but add comments if you think of any. I might actually make this a page, so it can be updated every time there’s a new one. I know there’s a couple of new ones up right now, but I can’t remember them perfectly.

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  • http://vinounku.wordpress.com sugali

    Very good. Keep it coming:)

  • Anonymous

    those are awesome