http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZNspDuvkDE

This is my way of talking about The Social Network without dedicating a post to a pitiful attempt at being a film critic. I think this song is indicative of just how cool this David Fincher-Aaron Sorkin collaboration is. It’s a movie fueled by a fantastic soundtrack by Reznor and Ross, a non-stop script from Sorkin, and ingenious directing by Fincher. All the components come together to form the quickest two hours you’ll spend in a theater this year.

Yeah, Facebook is the backdrop for the action in the film, but it’s not what drives it. The movie is about a quest for importance — for coolness. It’s about a kid who was smart enough to take an idea and bring it to its inevitable end. Facebook almost does seem like an end, doesn’t it? If the end of the Cold War was the “end of history”, Facebook is the end of the anonymous internet — at least in the sense that neither is really true, but can easily be seen that way. ANYWAY…

Fincher brilliantly flips back and forth between the creation of Facebook and two depositions of the lawsuits it spawned, splicing together sentences, contrasting excitement with irritation, and chronicling the destruction of a friendship both in real-time and in retrospect. I haven’t even mentioned Jesse Eisenberg’s performance of Mark Zuckerberg, which will probably become the way most people imagine the youngest billionaire on the planet. It’s probably not fair nor intelligent to take the film as any sort of documentary, but it’s impossible not to be sucked in. Everything seems so damn believable, from Zuckerberg blogging about his ex-girlfriend (apparently actually true) while creating a website to rank Harvard girls in his spiteful mood, to the way he’s lured in by the magnetic personality of Sean Parker portrayed by Justin Timberlake*, to the arrogant way he dismisses any claims of wrongdoing.

It’s just an immaculately crafted movie, and the critics calling it some “defining movie of this generation” aren’t too far off. I never, ever thought I would say that going in. David Fincher is back.

*Seriously, Justin Timberlake’s performance was great. If you told me 10 years ago that some kid from N’Sync would be a good actor, and that Ben Affleck would be an arguably great director, I would have expected you to think a black dude was going to be president, too.

I want to know everything
I want to be everywhere
I want to fuck everyone in the world
I want to do something that matters

Does it really need explaining?

But it got me to thinking; I thought about how I would break it down into my personal components. I feel overwhelmed with how many different things I would love to do at any point in time and I end up deciding on none of them. Sometimes this is due to laziness; other times, depression. Right now, I’m going to lean towards the latter. It’s hard to focus on anything when you are just not happy in the slightest. I blame the long waits between rounds of MLB playoffs. I haven’t watched a game since Monday! So depressing.

Of the things that populate this list, some aren’t serious, some are very unlikely, some are impossible — and it’s certainly impossible to do all of them. Some things are simple activities, others are lifelong ventures. Some things are general, others are arbitrarily specific. Some things are just emotional and behavioral traits that I wish were different. But they are all things that crowd my head and fill me with disappointment when it comes to not accomplishing any of them. And this list definitely isn’t all-inclusive.

I want to:

Read every halfway decent book.
Watch every film Armond White has given a negative review.
Learn how to play Go.
Solve every crossword puzzle.
Play through every acclaimed video game.
Be better than you at every multiplayer video game.
Create an iPhone app.
Travel to every country the average person actually knows.
Live in numerous cities.
Write in my journal each night Doug-style.
Attend an Olympics.
Be closer with my friends and family.
See the Earth from space.
Take beautiful pictures.
Fall painfully in love again.
Experience a World Cup firsthand.
Accumulate a million Twitter followers.
Write a book.
Decimate my carbon footprint.
Upload a video to YouTube that subsequently goes viral.
Pen a movie script.
Learn to dance well.
Donate and volunteer more.
Run a 5K in 24 minutes.
Master Photoshop.
Keep abreast of every development and breakthrough in science.
Try stand-up comedy.
Listen to every well-known album.
Game the stock market.
Become a monster at chess.
Eat at a three-Michelin-star restaurant.
Blog everyday.
Stop being a moronic poker player.
Formulate some semblance of a coherent worldview.
Bang everyone’s mom — and well.
Learn to draw and paint.
Frustrate people with my Scrabble ability.
Peruse every influential newspaper and magazine.
Check out every beloved television show.
Pick up the guitar.
Let go of pointless regrets.
Keep up with every interesting blog.
Build a PC.
Not care what anyone thinks.
Watch every important sporting event.
Hustle douchebags at pool and darts.
Learn a bunch of languages.
Initiate conversation effortlessly with anyone.
Memorize dozens of mixed drinks.
Become a scratch golfer.
Get awesome at tennis.
Run a Major League baseball team.
Taste every beer and wine and spirit.
Be able to discuss politics intelligently.
Buy a front-row seat to the final of every major sport.
Have the ability to bust out 100 pushups in a row.
Develop some sense of style.
Learn to cook awesome shit.
Get a chance to start over.

And I want to do all these things while getting at least seven hours of sleep a night.

http://theslip.nin.com/

Trent Reznor owns. Radiohead had that one time deal, but now Trent has released two albums for free. It’s like he knows he’s going to die, and he’s just going on a writing spree — a la Tupac. Only the internet now allows an artist to release stuff as he writes it.

Apparently, it’s taking many people a long time to get their e-mails, but I got mine immediately. Trent knew I was listening to my The Downward Spiral CD this morning, and he rewarded me. Or maybe my e-mail was already in the database or something, from when Ghosts I-IV was released. I just know I’m currently downloading both the MP3 and FLAC versions of the album for FREE. LEGALLY.