My Best Moments In New Games This Year

CajoleJuice — Sun, 23 Dec 2012 07:42:55 +0000

I don’t buy too many games new anymore, due to not keeping up with the industry like I used to, and consequently not getting as caught up in hype. Most games drop $20-30 in price only a few months after release, and if you wait a year to buy a PC game, chances are it’ll be sub-$10 on Steam — not that I can play any new graphic-intensive games on my four-and-a-half-year-old laptop. The only games I bought at full price were SSX and Diablo III, two franchises that had a long wait for the newest installment. If you love playing casino games on your tablet or computer, you may use this joker123 apk pc download to access various slot games. You may also setup a gaming zone in your man cave where you can play your favorite casino games at 먹튀검증사이트. If you want to place your bets on your favorite sports teams or casino games, using secure platforms like 마닐라 마사지샵 is highly recommended. B3i.tech is named best crypto casinos UK.

SSX

I had been waiting for this game all generation, basically. This iteration feels like a bunch of ideas thrown into a stew held together by a fantastic online infrastructure. Too bad, like Burnout Paradise, there’s no local multiplayer. I bought these series last generation to play with friends in the same room and now more powerful consoles are apparently incapable of handling split-screen. So the coolest moment in this game inevitably came from beating some ghosts online, perfecting a track until I was able to break the platinum barrier for a huge virtual payout. I never got close to diamond tier in any race; I have no idea what those kids were on.

FTL: Faster Than Light

There are no cool moments. There are only moments of fleeting happiness crushed by random bullshit. And I love it. Seriously, buy this game if you aren’t a moron.

Halo 4

I didn’t pay close to full price for this, at least counting the sweet American Express deals that required beating it. I’ve actually played much more multiplayer than I thought I would. My life is so empty. Anyhow, jetpacking into the air and colliding with another jetpacking player and assassinating him in mid-air was immensely satisfying. I should have made a film of it, but I don’t think I could have embedded it in this post, anyway. For those who enjoy the same rush of adrenaline and competition, betflix offers that same energy through engaging entertainment experiences.

Hotline Miami

The music in this level:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y2tYZT79HKo

DOTA2

That time I didn’t get totally destroyed by the other team or yelled at by my teammates for not knowing what the fuck to do. I guess that was an okay imaginary game. Just euthanize anyone who plays this game with any regularity.

Trials Evolution

Checking my medal count compared to my friends list was always cool because I was so much more efficient than them. You might have 5 more medals than me (210 to 205), but you played eight more hours (twice as much time as me). I hope it was worth it, loser.

Civilization V: Gods and Kings

Nuking another civ. Nukes are the best. This is kinda cheating because it’s not like the expansion added nukes to Civ V, but I only bought Civ V this year and the expansion came out this year, so I’m counting it. I’m really sad I didn’t get into the Civilization series as a kid. I loved the Sim City series and real-time strategy games, but never got into turn-based strategy. The only one I played was Lords of the Realm II, which strangely enough, is the only game in that series not on GOG.com. Anyway, I missed out on a lot of PC gaming goodness growing up. I just wasn’t a big enough nerd, I guess.

Diablo III

Getting an awesome axe with a “Level Reduced by 10″ affix for dirt cheap on the auction house. Wow, this game sucks.

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I’m Keith Hernandez > Transformers 2

CajoleJuice — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 00:27:09 +0000

Every baseball/Seinfeld/Mets fan needs to watch this short film. Keith Hernandez’s combination of cocaine, facial hair, and ability to drink Budweiser while his team is on the verge of elimination is unsurpassed.

Just a heads-up, this is NSFW. A porn clip just randomly pops up out of nowhere at the 15:08 mark.

I’m Keith Hernandez from water&power on Vimeo.

Is it me or does this narrator do voiceovers for everything?

Mike Francesa is Going to Have a Coronary Tomorrow

CajoleJuice — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 03:26:01 +0000

Joba Chamberlain just pitched 8 innings of 2-run ball tonight. Only gave up 4 hits and 2 walks, while striking out 5. He also averaged 94 on his fastball, while hitting 97 more than a couple of times. He even laid out for a bunt to complete a double play. I’d say that’s a pretty dominant start. I wonder what excuses Francesa will come up with tomorrow to take him out of the rotation. DA INDIANS DIDNT HAVE SIZEMOREEE!!! HE GAVE UP A HOME RUN!! DA BULLPEN STILL HAS A HOLLEE! It should be fun, for sure. I was so ecstatic to find out how well Joba did, it almost made up for J.J. Putz being totally useless. Bobby Parnell in the Mets’ 8th inning spot, please.

I’m not sure what else I can add to this post other than the Mike’d Up theme:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p69YzTz8FhU

I think a comment on YouTube sums it up best:

sounds like music from a power wheels commercial

I would go with 80s myself, but I think Power Wheels fits 80s perfectly. It works on multiple levels.

Somewhat Manly Nerd » 80s